It was that time of night when anyone who had a home should be in it, and tucked up in their nice comfortable and warm bed.

It was a dark dank & dreary when Joan stepped out of the Daimler. It had been a long day. She was sick to the pit of her stomach and not sure how long she could continue with the stress of these last few days.

Locking the door behind her she checked the answering machine for messages. They were rather routine and nothing that needed immediate attention. Moving to the lounge she opened a bottle of rich red wine, one glass would not be enough this evening, yet it seemed ironic since it was the very colour she wished to erase from her inner eye and mind. Turning to the music centre she inserted a CD, selected a track and set it on repeat.

Heading for the bathroom with the glinting glass and the bottle Joan ran the water for a bath being heavy handed with the bath essence, she needed a good soak and to scrub the memory of the last few hours from her skin and mind.

It was only then that she removed her gloves. There was no way she wanted to leave traces or the stench of raw flesh on the door handles, answering machine or bath taps.

Joan lit a series of nightlights along the back and side ledges of the bath, the flickering light would last long enough for her purposes. She undressed quickly and stepped into the now well filled foaming bath.

The warm water was comforting on her skin and she began to scrub her body as if she were trying to remove a layer of skin. The scent of the evenings activity reached deep into her very core. Sipping the wine she felt it warm and relax her from deep within.

Sliding deeper into the water, it almost reached her chin, she closed her eyes and tried not to think…. Let the music take over for the moment…..

‘When I’m alone I dream of the horizon and words fail;……….’

Joan saw the butchers knife and again felt the force as she drove it into the flesh just above the rib cage. It was not how she imagined it would feel, and the blood was slow to reach the surface. She had kept going right down to the soft abdomen . Her own heaved and felt as if that knife were twisting deep within her.

She scrubbed her hands.

‘..yes, I know there is no light in a room where the sun is absent, if you are not here with me……’

Rub and scrub.

‘Time to say goodbye.     —     I’ll go…..’
Sinking further into the water she felt the suds touch her nose.

‘to countries I never saw and shared with you,
now, yes, I shall experience them……’

Eyes closing….

‘time to say goodbye.’

Suddenly sitting upright, Joan had the answer, she would say ‘goodbye!’.

Goodbye to the chain of butcher’s shops that she inherited a week before when her husband keeled over with a fatal heart attack.

No way was Joan cut out to spend a day working in an abattoir never mind a lifetime!

Smiling with relief, Joan blew a bubble filled virtual kiss to Andrea Bocelli for the part his singing played in reaching her decision.

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The topic Dark was chosen for us this week by Will Knott Now why not join me as we tiptoe along to see how the other active members handle the dark:- Delirious, Maxi Maria/Gaelikaa, Maria SilverFox OCD writer, Padmum, Paul, Ramana, The Old Fossil, Will Knott.

Update: I am delighted to see that Anu is returning to the fold and hopefully we will be able to enjoy her posts from week to week.  Welcome back Anu!